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Murphy's Laws For Work:

- A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the pants.

- Don't be irreplaceable, if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

- The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.

- You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.

- Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.

- Never ask two questions in a business letter. The reply will discuss the one you are least interested in, and say nothing about the other.

- When the bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves.

- If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.

- There will always be beer cans rolling on the floor of your car when the boss asks for a ride home from the office.

- Mother said there would be days like this, but she never said there would be so many.

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