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Joke Archives |
Rated |
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Balls |
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NOT FOR THE EASILY OFFENDED:
The Pentagon recently found it had too many generals and
offered an early retirement bonus. They promised any general
who retired straight away his full annual benefits plus
$10,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any
two points on the general's body, with the general getting to
select any pair of points he wished.
The first man, an Air Force general, accepted. He asked the
pension man to measure from the top of his head to the tip of
his toes. Six feet, he walked out with a check of $720,000.
The second man, an Army general, asked them to measure from
the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. Eight feet, he
walked out with a check for $960,000.
When the third general, a grizzled old Marine, was asked where
to measure, he told the pension man: "From the tip of my penis
to the bottom of my testicles."
The pension man suggested that perhaps the Marine general
might like to reconsider, pointing out the nice checks the
previous two generals had received.
The Marine insisted and the pension expert said that would be
fine but that he'd better get the medical officer to do the
measuring. The medical officer attended and asked the general
to drop 'em. He did. The medical officer placed the tape on
the tip of the general's penis and began to
work back.
"My God!" he said. "Where are your testicles?"
The general replied, "In Vietnam." (from "RKent")
     
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