Things to do @ Wal-Mart while your spouse or significant other is taking his/her sweet time!
Get boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they don't realize it.
Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.
Make a trail of orange juice on the floor, leading to the restrooms.
Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in housewares," and see what happens. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10."
Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
Put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with Pokemon vs. the X-Men.
Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
Switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the restrooms.
Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission Impossible."
Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.
In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels.
When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume "It's those voices again!"
Go into the dressing room and yell real loud..."Hey, we're out of toilet paper in here!"
