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Martha Stewart's Christmas letter to Erma Bombeck just
discovered:

Hi Erma,

This perfectly delightful note is being sent on paper I
made myself to tell you what I have been up to. Since it
snowed last night, I got up early and made a sled with old
barn wood and a glue gun. I hand painted it in gold leaf, got
out my loom, and made a blanket in peaches and mauves. Then
to make the sled complete, I made a white horse to pull it,
from DNA that I had just sitting around in my craft room. By
then, it was time to start making the place mats and napkins
for my 20 breakfast guests. I'm serving the old standard
Stewart twelve-course breakfast, but I'll let you in on a
little secret: I didn't have time to make the tables and
chairs this morning, so I used the ones I had on hand. Before
I moved the table into the dining room, I decided to add just
a touch of the holidays. So I repainted the room in pinks and
stenciled gold stars on the ceiling. Then, while the homemade
bread was rising, I took antique candle molds and made the
dishes (exactly the same shade of pink) to use for breakfast.
These were made from Hungarian clay, which you can get at
almost any Hungarian craft store. Well, I must run. I need
to finish the buttonholes on the dress I'm wearing for
breakfast. I'll get out the sled and drive this note to the
post office as soon as the glue dries on the envelope I'll be
making. Hope my breakfast guests don't stay too long, I have
40,000 cranberries to string with bay leaves before my
speaking engagement at noon. It's a good thing.

Love,
Martha Stewart

PS When I made the ribbon for this typewriter, I used 1/8-inch
gold gauze. I soaked the gauze in a mixture of white grapes
and blackberries which I grew, picked, and crushed last week
just for fun.

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