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MURPHY'S LAWS ON WORK
- Keep your boss's boss off your boss's back. This is what I'm
doing wrong.
- Everything can be filed under 'miscellaneous.'
- Never delay the ending of a meeting or the beginning of a
cocktail hour.
- To err is human, to forgive is not company policy.
- Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he
is supposed to be doing.
- Important letters that contain no errors will develop errors
in the mail.
- The last person that quit or was fired will be the one held
responsible for everything that goes wrong - until the next
person quits or is fired.
- There is never enough time to do it right the first time, but
there is always enough time to do it over.
- The more pretentious a corporate name, the smaller the
organization. (For instance, The Murphy Center for Codification
of Human and Organizational Law, contrasted to IBM, GM, AT&T ...).
- If you are good, you will be assigned all the work. If you
are really good, you will get out of it.
- You are always doing something marginal when the boss drops
by your desk.
- People are always available for work in the past tense.
- If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.
- At work, the authority of a person is inversely proportional
to the number of pens that person is carrying.
- When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.
- You will always get the greatest recognition for the job you
least like.
- No one gets sick on Wednesdays.
- When confronted by a difficult problem you can solve it more
easily by reducing it to the question, 'How would the Lone
Ranger handle this?'
- The longer the title, the less important the job.
- Machines that have broken down will work perfectly when the
repairman arrives.
- An 'acceptable' level of employment means that the government
economist to whom it is acceptable still has a job.
- Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it makes
it worse.
- All vacations and holidays create problems, except for one's own.
- Success is just a matter of luck, just ask any failure.
     
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