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This was in the Washington Post... the title of the article was
"Best Comeback Line Ever."
In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22-year-old
white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38
p.m. on Friday.
Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public
indecency, and public intoxication at the Gwinnett County courthouse
on Monday. The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin
patch he decided to stop.
"You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no
one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn't," he
stated in a phone interview. Lawrence went on to say that he pulled
over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was
appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to
satisfy his alleged "need." "I guess I was just really into it, you
know?" he commented with evident embarrassment.
In the process, Lawrence apparently failed to notice a Gwinnett
County police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until
officer Brenda Taylor approached him.
"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor.
"I walked up to (Lawrence) and he's...just working away at this
pumpkin." Taylor went on to describe what happened when she
approached Lawrence. "I just went up and said, 'Excuse me sir, but
do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?'
He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then
looked me straight in the face and said, "A pumpkin? Damn...is it
midnight already?"
     
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