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The Boston Symphony was performing Beethoven's Ninth. In the
piece, there's a long passage about 20 minutes during which
the bass violinists have nothing to do. Rather than sit
around the whole time looking stupid, some bassists decided
to sneak offstage and go to the tavern next door for a quick
one.
After slamming several beers in quick succession, one of them
looked at his watch. "Hey! We need to get back!"

"No need to panic," said a fellow bassist, "I thought we
might need some extra time, so I tied the last few pages of
the conductor's score together with string. It'll take him a
few minutes to get it untangled."

A few moments later they staggered back to the concert hall
and took their places in the orchestra. About this time, a
member of the audience noticed the conductor seemed a bit
edgy and said as much to her companion.

"Well, of course," said her companion, "Don't you see? It's
the bottom of the Ninth, the score is tied, and the bassists
are loaded."

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